The Amsterdam Cram

20th August 2012 (Amsterdam, The Netherlands)

Boff was apologetic about yesterday's botched travel plans so let me decide all the activities today. I managed to show him how to cram a lot into a day without it feeling rushed.

Anne Frank's House: We couldn't buy tickets over the internet or via our hotel so queued
up around the block. I sent Boff out for poffertjes and coffee and orange juice. The experience was excellent, everything a museum should be: preservation, explanation, anecdotes. I got incredibly teary when I saw Anne's room with the pics from magazines she'd glued up on the walls and I don't think I stopped feeling heavy until after I left.

Boff said it was the ultimate tragedy that Mr Frank, obviously a smart man, had put a lot of thought into saving his family. He'd tracked the Allies' movements via radio reports and knew they were on their way before they were ratted out by someone. The most tragic part was that he alone survived while the rest of the family perished in various concentration camps around Europe.

Photo of the day is of the street outside Anne Frank's house, a rather amusing juxtaposition. The thing about Amsterdam is that you have to look out for canals, trams, cars and bikes when crossing the road.

The Tulip Museum: A very different museum explaining the history of tulips, their journey from the Middle East, the Dutch obsession with them, the Tulip Crash, different varieties and current farming techniques. There were a lot of interesting presentation techniques that made this exhibition worth ther 3 euro entry fee despite its small size.

I decided we'd go to Rembrandthuis so we had lunch on the way at a typical cafe (I had croquettes and tomato soup and beer) and then sort of lost each other in a street market. I waited at the corner for 10 minutes then decided to go to Rembrandthuis and just sat in the foyer waiting for Boff to realise that that was the best place to look for me. This is the tragedy of not having working phones overseas. He did eventually find me.

Rembrandthuis: When Rembrandt went bankrupt, the repo people had to do an inventory of everything in his house, which is why the museum has such an accurate record of what it contained. While some of the objects are replicas, a lot of the furniture was actually Rembrandt's and has been preserved in the place where they were kept. Interesting snippet: People in those days used to sleeping sitting up because they believed you would die if too much blood went to your head. That's why all the beds are so small (not because people were 50cm shorter in those days, as I hypothesised).

Apart from containing the painter's domestic artefacts, the museum also held his and his contemporaries' paintings (he was a dealer as well as an artist), a storeroom for his interesting ephemera and, of course, his studio. The studio contained two demos that were also fascinating in themselves: a guy did a paint mixing demo and the lady did an etching demo.

Artis Zoo: We eventually found ourselves at Artis Zoo (what did you expect of 'my day'?!). It had just gone 4.30pm and the staff kept reminding us that they would close at 6pm. We told them it was okay, we would go through quite quickly. It didn't look like Artis had any animals that I hadn't seen before so we just headed for my favourites only to find out that there were a lot of areas where the animals roamed free, for example lemur 'island', which the ruffed lemurs could leave if they wanted to (there were no physical barriers) but were content to stay on.

Artis also had a few humid houses where they kept saki monkeys and iguanas and birds. These tripled-doored enclosures meant that observers could wander through in commune with the animals without accidentally letting them out. We got some great photos. I also saw a hyrax for the first time. Also sat in front of the penguin pool watching one female get chased by a dozen males and constantly escaping but then going back into the fray (crazy chick) and the seal pool where babies were nursing and the mothers barked while feeding them. Eventually a security guard on a bike told us we had to leave in 15 minutes, at 7.30pm; they had let us stay in an extra 90 minutes.

Had dinner at an Indonesian restaurant (this was actually Boff's suggestion but it turned out to be a good one because the banquet was delicious) and then visited the red light district on the way home. There wasn't anything there that I found shocking (no, we didn't go to the live sex show) though we did spend our last 14 euro or so on double entry to The Erotic Museum (see what I did there?). It wasn't as titillating as I'd hoped, but it did have some interesting historic stuff on the lower floors.

We spent a lot of money in Amsterdam, about 300 euro, which was about twice what we were doing in comparable cities. In some ways maybe it was a good thing we were only there for a day.

Pret-a-manger

13th August 2012 (Lille, France)

I may not have explained this spontaneous trip to those I haven't seen in a while. Basically, Boff was invited to play for the Australian go team at the 2nd World Mind Sports Games in Lille, France. At the time he was invited, he had already planned a trip to Greece with his sister and Greek brother-in-law—both former modern Greek lecturers at UNE—and a couple of weeks of wandering around Eastern Europe. By extending his trip it turned out he could see more of Eastern Europe and attend the Games. As you can imagine, I was not at all happy about spending two months alone at home by myself so I decided to tag along for the last month.

The Lille posts may not be very interesting for a couple of reasons. One is that because I didn't do it in 'intense' mode, not as many interesting things happened on each day; the other is that I capitulated to the malady I acquired in Poland.

Photo of the day is from my 'blitz' tour of the town centre. This is the Eglise Saint-Maurice. The girl sitting on the steps was begging for money. I ignored her and went into the church to have a look. While in there I started to feel bad that I'd ignored her so I went back out and asked if she wanted something to eat. I have passable French but it turned out she had a severe speech impediment which meant she couldn't speak, but seemed to understand me. I went and bought her a vegie baguette from a nearby boulangerie. She gestured a lot, then she wrote something illegible in my notebook. I played a game of charades with her: she seemed to say I had seen the light or seen god... or something.

Knots

10th August 2012 (Munich, Germany)

Somehow Boff and I managed to get our dates mixed up. As a result, he thought I'd be in Bruges (it's in Belgium) today to meet him, while I was still pestering him for the address of where we were supposed to be tomorrow. This was not helped by the fact that our prime method of contact is WhatsApp, which we can only use when we both have wifi.

The best train to Belgium left at 3am in the morning via Cologne. The ticket attendant told me the train from Cologne to Belgium was full so I just booked the first leg to Cologne and hoped for the best. Once Boff and I got our wires uncrossed he decided we should sojourn in Ghent instead "because Bruges is full of tourists and I've taken my hypocrisy pills". I returned to the station. The train (the connection from Cologne to Brussels) wasn't any less full, so I took the option of waiting in Cologne for three hours. Sorted. Ish.

I went to Munich Zoo in the morning. It was a lovely zoo and I saw capybara for the first time. There were also a lot of animals play-fighting—sea lions, gazelles, siamangs—some of which I caught on short videos and will put up in due course.

Photo of the day is a pretzel bigger than my head. I had reserved a packet of crackers and a small tub of not-Nutella from the breakfast spread for snacks but was still hungry, then saw this beast and had to conquer it. It was 3.50 euro. It was a lot of carbs. But I ate it.

Under construction

9th August 2012 (Munich, Germany)

After the 'pinakothek' conundrum, I set out to find out what 'fahrt' meant. I have a rather juvenile view of the word 'fahrt', so suddenly einfahrt means 'one fart' and ausfahrt means 'a fart from down under' (as opposed to blowing raspberries, for example). Turns out it just means 'ride', hence fahrkarten = 'ride card' = ticket.

Spent a great deal of the morning in the Residenz sector, which is where some Bavarian royalty used to live. The touristy bits are the Treasury, the Palace and the Theatre, which I did in that order. The Treasury, as you might expect, was full of bling including stuff that you kind of go 'why the hell would you encrust that in jewels?', like plates and prayer books. It was not as interesting as I'd hoped.

The Palace was a lot better, although a lot of the rooms had been destroyed in World War II and have since been rebuilt and then redecorated in the style of the curator's choosing from the millennium or so that the Ludwigs have lived there rather than the latest use of the room. So there were a number of offices that suddenly became bedrooms again, for example. There was a lot of gilt as well, and a fair number of portraits of people I forget now.

The Theatre was lovely, but a very disappointing 'tour'. Basically, you went in, you came out, no behind-the-scenes action or view from the boxes, for example. Photo of the day comes from that venue, though: it was being cleaned at the time. The red drapes aren't really drapes, you see, but some kind of plaster imitation, Rococo style. The guy in the photo uses a brush to dislodge dust and a nozzled vacuum cleaner to suck up the dust. I thought it represented Munich quite well. The city is mostly under construction, after all.

After Residenz I paid a visit to the Viktualienmarkt, which is a food market area just south of the city centre. I met a guy called Klaus at a cafe table and argued with him about smoking (he is pro, I am anti). Then had to find a nice way to ditch him so I could go to the Englischer Garten, which is a massive green area in the north.

The Lonely Planet recommended the beer garden near the Chinese Turm, so I headed there. It was big but not that exciting, so I changed course and aimed for the Japanese Teehaus only to find, when I arrived, that it's only open one weekend a month and you have to book ahead for sittings.

For dinner I tried another Lonely Planet recommendation, the Baader Cafe, which happened to be in an area similar to Newtown, except the street was less King Street and more... Wilson Street. The waitress didn't treat me as a dumb tourist so I ordered my random dinner with false confidence. I ended up with duck, couscous and zucchini for my main and a crepe with berries for dessert. Only the crepe was filled with, wait for it, sauerkraut. WTF?!

#26: Popcorn?

Er no, I shouldn't. I don't mind popcorn, but if I weigh things up correctly, in the big chain cinemas I'd pay something in the vicinity of $9.90 for a small combo (drink + popcorn) presented in receptacles roughly the size of my head.

If I finish the combo, I would have consumed enough sugar, salt and butter to power a small nation and therefore feel guilty. If I don't finish the combo, then I feel like I've wasted money and food and therefore feel guilty.

I'd rather pay less money for less popcorn, but they don't really give you that option unless you're at one of the smaller theatres. However, the smaller theatres I go to are usually licensed, in which case I generally purchase booze with the bill still only coming to $7.

Generally I don't like to eat in a movie because there's no real way to do it quietly. I was running late once and when I got into the cinema I realised I was starving but only had an apple in my bag. I ate it during the ads and trailers and the woman in front of me turned around to glare at me. I wanted to say, "lady, I'm not stupid or inconsiderate enough to eat this during the film" but instead I just smiled at her and took a large bite, daring her to say something.

My usual movie treat is an EasyWay, if convenient (the reason I go to Event Macquarie and Event George St) but I'll occasionally get a frozen Coke. Which reminds me—what the hell happened to the frozen grape Hoyts Mandarin had so very briefly and then took away?

Day 27 - Total number of films you own on DVD and video.
Day 28 - Last film you bought.
Day 29 - Last film you watched.
Day 30 - Five films that mean a lot to you.

Twenty-one categories of this meme are from Books and Movies and Wordsmithsonia. The rest of the categories are my own creation.

Diet

Things I ate this week that I shouldn't have:

• (Wednesday) Packet of cheap Aldi fruit jellies that were supposed to be sour but weren't;


• (Friday) Dodgy felafel roll prepared by a man who didn't wear gloves and didn't wash his hands prior to preparation accompanied by an ancient sitting-in-the-counter-window-all-day Greek salad;


• (Saturday) Bowl of strawberries and cream, having already eaten two pancakes layered with strawberries and cream;


• (Sunday) 700ml of Cottee's Instant Vanilla Pudding made with Coles Lite Milk, which had a use by date of 25/09. It smelled okay. It was the only way I could think to finish the milk;


• (Sunday) Five slices of thick-cut raisin toast slathered in butter. I had to finish the loaf.

Pants!

My small pants are too big, my big pants are too small...*

I recently read a post by Neil Gaiman at his website about the 'jeans test' to figure out whether you've been putting on weight. This is a phenomenon currently sweeping my closet. My baggy jeans fit perfectly and my favourite cargo pants (ie my only cargo pants which are 10 years old because I cannot find a pair that doesn't have 'bits' - ie toggles and random zips and straps and shit - all over them), which were my 'comfy' pair of pants now leave marks on my stomach if I sit for too long.

At least Mr Gaiman has a winter to blame his weight gain on - I have nothing. In fact, I've been quite healthily eating plenty of vegetables and exercising a lot in the past couple of months. Yes, I do snack and I do eat out but no more than usual (ie, the last couple of years) so I can't really understand why I'm starting to pile it on now.

For confirmation, I saw my weight in numbers when I went to give blood because they have to weigh you to make sure you're in the eligible weight range to donate. Seems I've put on 6kg since the last time they weighed me (nine months ago), which was itself 3kgs up on my weight six months prior to that. Generally speaking, I need to lose about 10kgs to get back to my mass 18 months ago.

The thing is, when I look at myself in the nude I don't look fat, but the clothes test never lies (and neither do the scales) and damned if I'm going to buy clothes that won't fit WHEN I lose weight.

And the worst thing? The worst thing is not all the work I have to put into losing the extra kilos. The dietary discipline, the punishing exercise regime, I can handle. It's the fact that I have to become a cliche 'person on a diet' that bloody well shits me. Low fat everything, refusing biscuits with afternoon tea that no longer exists and fake sugar. Ugh, I hate fake sugar, I think I'll do without. Save me!

* By the way, this does make sense. It means even my smallest pants are considered 'large' size and what I thought were big pants are too tight.

Lotus & Ming (dim sum)

I'm currently writing a story about niche businesses and one of my interviewees was the lovely Karen Lavecky from Lotus & Ming. She was kind enough to send me some of her product (frozen dim sum) to try and I promised to send her some feedback.

The taste test involved:
Peking duck spring rolls
Shiitake & leek spring rolls
Pork & bok choy dumplings
Scallop & shiitake har gow (dumplings)
Soy fusion dipper
Spicy plum dipper

I should preface this by saying I prepared two rounds of dim sum in different ways. I’m terrible at frying so the first method I tried was baking, as per the back of all four packets. This worked well for the spring rolls but gave the dumplings an unusual crispiness (which wasn’t bad, just unorthodox).

My second attempt was experimental, baking the spring rolls in a sandwich press, which worked and took less time to cook and, since I don’t have any steaming implements, steaming the dumplings using a lettuce leaf on a wire cooling rack perched above a saucepan with boiling water in it, covered by the pan lid. This was more successful than baking the dumplings and it deserves to be said that the scallop dumplings tasted exactly like they do in a yum cha restaurant with the added texture of the shiitake.

Both the Peking duck spring rolls and the shiitake & leek spring rolls under both baking methods maintained their crispiness and went well with both dipping sauces. The triumph here is the balance of the heavier favours – the duck and the leek – with the more delicate ‘top notes’ of the bean sprouts and shiitake respectively. The best combination was the peking duck with the plum sauce and the shiitake/leek with the soy fusion.

My favourite of the lot was the flavoursome pork & bok choy dumplings, which exploited the right balance with the simplicity of the combination, a ‘why didn’t anyone do this before?’ type flavour. It married equally well with both sauces and, like the har gow, worked better steamed than baked.

Overall, the range seemed lighter, fresher and healthier than what you would get at standard yum cha. The option ‘to fry or not to fry’ means that consumers can control the amount of oil in the meal, which means you can walk away, belly full, without feeling greasy but still have your fill of tasty dim sum. I like tasting what’s in the dim sum as opposed to the additives (oil, fat, MSG) so it is great that the true flavours are more prominent in this take-home range.

Yeah, I'll be buying some to keep in the freezer in case guests drop by.

Food rating: 8/10
Enjoyment rating: 7/10 (a personal thing - not that fond of Chinese vege)

Eatability

Why don't they have a classy restaurant at Sydney Airport? It would be a reprieve from aeroplane food, a good place to stop for people in transit or a hearty last meal before a loved one flew off. It would be popular with exec types who don't want to line up with the plebs in the food court or choose from the plethora of same-same cafes. The food would need to have a quick turnaround time and diners could save money off airport parking (if they drove in). I think a classy restaurant could earn heaps of money. And it would be a nice place to take someone and be assured that they won't miss their flight.

Easy Mac (convenience food)

I don't usually review food. Largely because even though I'm quite picky I'll generally eat anything. Palate and ambience don't really come into it as long as there's nutrition to be had. This review, however, is a cautionary tale about what happens when you eat to procrastinate and see a sample pack of Kraft Easy Mac sitting on the kitchen bench.

Pour the macaroni into a bowl, add 2/3 cup of cold water and microwave (uncovered) for 3-4 mins on high. Open cheese sauce, mix well with macaroni and there you go, Easy Mac.

I can cook anything that involves boiling water. Rice, pasta, couscous, it has all happened. Cooking food in a microwave is a little disconcerting - it's the kind of thing I used to do when I was 12 and ate soggy pies, cooked from frozen, for dinner when I didn't want to accompany my parents to their friend's dinner party.

Easy Mac is a little disconcerting. Microwaving the pasta is not a good start. The deliberate watery nature of the pasta after it has been cooked is not a good sign. The fact that the cheese sauce is a strange orange powder (made from Kraft cheese - as if that will allay my fears) is also a bit frightening. The cheese powder mixes in with the hot microwaved water to make the sauce in which the macaroni drowns. Souper. Processed city. Convenient, but of dubious origin. I cut up some fresh tomato and green olives, then added some of the baby spinach and rocket mix we had in the fridge as vegie penance. Edible.

Note to self: do not eat food that has come in the mail.

* - a recipe for disaster